Leap of faith

Relationships are hard. Trusting anyone is hard. I feel anxious all the time when I’m not with him like he will find out that he’s made a mistake. That maybe he doesn’t want me after all. And then I will be on my own again. That doesn’t really scare me though, being on my “own”. I know that there is not much in this world I can’t handle anymore. And every time He throws something new at me, He always helps me through. So I’m not worried. I’m scared of the pain though I guess, I know how it feels to lose love. I’m not sure how much more I could bear. But I do know that I can’t control it. I could do everything “perfect” and he could still leave tomorrow. That’s reality, it’s not up to me. So I want to just love him and smile when thinking about him, curl up in his arms after work, fall asleep with him at night, and wake up with him in the morning. I am so grateful for this gift of love and companionship, I think I will just take the leap of faith that maybe this is what I’ve been waiting for.