Thursday, March 24, 2011

Bored Meeting


My life has been a hot mess lately. A reflection of me maybe? I'm not sure. Where do I even begin? Two years ago when I met Buzz? One year ago when I met Garrett? Right now? I was so stressed out today I broke out in a stress rash on my chest/neck area. Yes, college friends, like the ones I broke out in before any speech I had to give, my panhellenic interview, and any other praticularly upsetting circumstances. It got so bad I had to start wearing high necked shirts all the time. That's devasting, considering how amazing my clevage is. Today before the Moose meeting my boss decides to stress me out fifteen minutes before, asking me to redo 9 packets of contracts with about 20 pages each and only so fifteen minutes later, we can cross out the changes I just made and update them with the correct details. Overall it was stupid and a waste of time and diffenitely not worth a minor panic attack. One Lorezapam later, I calmed down enough to conduct the meeting. Everything went well. I just don't know why everyone in that place gets so stressed out about the most insignificant details. You would think the f*cking world was coming to an end the way everyone gets so worked up.

My day today began with a phone call from Xtina. She very rarely gets worked up and has an amazing way of being gentle while firm. I adore her. She is my better half at work and I would die with out her support. I'm sure it takes a lot to be confined to a 12x12 office with me for 40 hours a week and she handles it beautifully.

There was an issue with a guestroom we preblocked for a meeting. I double checked everything two weeks ago when I finalized contracts, everything was fine, then as if it were a surprise everyone was shocked that there was a list of VIPs coming in for the Moose. Now me I wasn't surprised because I booked the event last year in July for 2011 and 2012. I went to the first meeting in November regarding the Moose, I put together pages and pages of contracts, reviewed them and revised them and resent them more times than I can count, I read email after email from management and clients, I attended the second meeting for the Moose in January, I met with Dennis 3 times to review contracts and rooming lists, I reviewed the group resume that Xtina spent hours preparing and reviewed the email one she sent it out. The Moose checking in today was not a surprise for me or Xtina. Or anyone on the restaurant side actually. With 405 room nights coming into the hotel, hotel revenue will likely beat my catering/banquet revenue. That being said, you would have to have been living under a rock for the past 10 months to not be aware of the details. I fill her in, take care of another reservation, and tell her to call down. Crisis averted.

As I walk in the door:

"Applied Industrial canceled their lunch tomorrow. And the audit committe meeting can't be in 114! Make sure you write it on the contract and figure out where it needs to move."

"I know. I have already taken care of this." I respond, while thinking how about you focus on your job considering you suck at it.

At 1:30pm, morning crisis I thought was averted comes back. Why it hasn't been taken care of at this point, I'm not sure? Considering guests will begin checking in at any time. No one has any idea when anyone is checking in even though all the information is in the file or on the resume, no one knows the rooms were pre-blocked even though we sent all the information out Friday.

This is bullsh*t, I am not responsible for making sure you review the information for groups coming in house. Especially when you are management.

So then my boss stresses me out and then I have to conduct this meeting with our biggest clients. Boss had told me I would be running the meeting, but then sits and the head of the table and proceeds to talk out of turn about nothing important.

We end up wasting a ton of paper and all in all the meeting was ridiculous. My day proceeded much of the same so it's no wonder I retreated to the table closet in the banquet hallway to sit on a stack of checkered dance floor and drink a giant diet coke all the while trying not to cry for fear of smearing my makeup and embarassing myself yet again.

However, looking back on really St. Patty's Day til now, my life has been a little bit of a whirlwind of confusion and drama. More details to come....

Monday, March 14, 2011

Egg Carton


I'm disappointed today. A friend let me down. And that seems to be happening a lot lately. I have been telling my sponsor, Dionne, everything about my life. The other day she said to me that she thinks of relationships as holding an egg carton, there is only twelve spots that we can handle at one time. I told her about a couple people I didn't want to be friends with any more and she said, "Think of all the new people you can fit in the carton!" Sunday I told her about an experience I had with a friend on Saturday night and she said I should tell them, "I am thisclose to taking you out of my egg carton!" And that is why she is so awesome. And it's so true, I can really only probably nurture twelve at any one time. But like usual, I have taken on too much and it's time to downsize.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Relief

I'm angry today. Tonight, this morning. Right now. I cried twice today, on the way home from work and again on the way home from the meeting. I feel suffocated by pain. My head hurts and I'm tired. Tired of fighting, tired of losing, tired of everything. I'm on edge with everyone because I can't sleep. I have been late to work and I've been barely eating. Lord Help. At least I know He is reliable. I can wait patiently because He brings relief.

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn. Isaiah 61:1-2

Jesus turned and saw her. "Take heart, daughter," he said, "your faith has healed you." And the woman was healed from that moment. Matthew 9:22

He loves women like me and He heals women like me.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Fairytale

Today was a fairytale I wore a dress, you wore a dark gray T-shirt, you told me I was pretty when I looked like a mess, Today was a fairytale.

Monday, March 7, 2011

Busted


Random thought. I am so sick of dancing with the stars. For reals. America, get over it already. I'm so annoyed that celebrity news is even deemed worthy to pop up in my CNN news block on my iGoogle in the morning like Christina Aguilera's arrest. And honestly I'm into Christina getting arrested for drunk in public. I got a DUI in 2009 and got arrested. It's not very cool, I don't recommend it. And that was a DUI. She got a DIP. That even sounds stupid. I don't think they really call it that but that's kind of what happened. How dumb do you have to be acting to get a drunk in public. That's embarrassing and definitely not CNN newsworthy. I feel bad though. As if getting arrested isn't bad enough, it gets broadcast across the news.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

March 1

So today is the day. I'm taking a month off men, except my gays. 31 days there are in March, 4 weekends. The thought of it gives me anxiety, but day one is almost done and so far so good. I did already have to turn down one invite, but it really wasn't one I wanted anyway so it was fairly easy to turn down. However, I met a man this past weekend and he made me giddy for the first time in a long time. I want him to call, but if he does, then what? My immediate reaction to the exchange of phone numbers, which happens oh so frequently was that he will never call anyway so I do not need to worry. Then again it's only Tuesday. It's amazing freedom to have four weekends, no dates. Except with my girls and my gays. Whatever will I do... That's the amazing part, whatever I want.