I'm beside myself about this. I feel strangely calm and collected. I have proceeded with life as usual. Better than usual. I'm sleeping, eating again. Making a conscious decision to not drink my pain away. I am accepting that it's just over. I gave it the best I had. The best I knew how. This outcome may not be the most desirable and I'm sad. But life ultimately goes on. I got up this morning, dressed, and went for coffee. I was on my game at the wedding show, perky and attentive with my brides. Left work and made a brief appearance with the family. Headed to the dog park as usual and met my new friends. Watched the dogs run for an hour, home, shower, Desperate Housewives. Business as usual. He's on my mind. He's almost always on my mind. I keep thinking I could have done something different. I should have tried harder and comprised more. Maybe I provoked him or overstepped. Maybe everything was in my head and I am the crazy one. Bottom line, regardless of what happened in the past. He's gone, it's over, and I'm alone…again.
Now's the hard part. We move on.
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