Timing

I work in an industry where I deal with couples all the time. I deal with brides every day. Happy couples are everywhere. I love what I do. I really do. I am so lucky to be able to work with people every day. And I'm good at it. I think it is harder to be a single woman than it is to be a single man. Men move on very easily after a breakup. They quickly find another woman to spend their time with and they forget. Woman internalize a lot of emotion. We rethink all of our actions throughout the duration of the relationship. We wonder where he's at and who he's with. Does he miss us? It's hard to want to put yourself out there again after feeling what we do after a relationship has run it's course. Women are amazing creatures. We are strong and resilient. We pick ourselves up after a fall like this and move along. This experience the past few weeks has changed me. And now that I'm not drinking anymore I'm finally seeing things clearly. It's amazing how the timing of it all can be so off though. Not only with Buzz, but with Joey. I don't know why or how we got to this place again. It was almost exactly a year ago that we were here before. I was thinking tonight that I have been selfish. I have no right to even think he should give me a second chance. Because now all of a sudden I'm ready, I think he should drop everything for me. It's not fair to him. I wasn't ready before, he isn't ready now. The time is off and who knows what the future will hold.